Summer Spot

This is my Summer spot.  After my Bird is in bed and my husband is situated on the couch watching reruns
of Two and a Half Men; this is where I go.  I sit. I read. I drink an Izze, or a glass of wine, or a sweet tea.
*breathe in. breathe out.*  I stare at the sky and study the clouds or the early moon.  I ponder. I try not to ponder.  Sometimes I want nothing on my mind. Nothing but the sound of the birds, the breeze in the trees or the buzz of the cicadas. 
This particular evening I was engrossed in the novel I was reading, "The Help." If you haven't read it, you should. And you should buy it. Keep it. Let your children read it when they're older. 
And try an Izze.  I'm fond of Sparkling Blackberry but there are other flavors. 

I stay in my spot until it gets too dark to read or the mosquitoes start a buffet line at my feet.

Every evening I have the luxury to spend in my spot I always have company. I don't mind because he's

quiet, entertaining and mostly keeps to himself except when he takes a notion to light on my arm while I read.

Sometimes I like to imagine that he's visiting me as a representation of a loved one I've lost.  Just stopping in to say hello and everything is okay.  I don't really know if "he's" a he, but that's my first impression so that's what I go with.  I don't even name him because I feel like somehow that would be a hindrance to our relationship.  Each time I settle in my spot to read, think or not think...I look for him and pretty soon, he comes along to visit.

Chocolate Shake

Can you remember your very first sip of a chocolate milkshake?

This is my Bird at the county fair Sunday evening enjoying her very first chocolate milkshake from the local dairy farmers tent.  Her daddy is holding the cup for her because she's not even big enough to do that on her own yet.  I think a milkshake is one of those things that can transcend barriers dividing folks; age, ethnicity, socioeconomic status.  It's a simple pleasure that brings humanity together for one frosty cold, delicious moment.

We shared a sweet summer evening with our daughter and some old friends in my hometown.  We drove an hour from where we live in the city to spend time showing Wren the 4-H animals, eating "elephant ears" and cheering on our favorite competitor in the kids pedal tractor pull!  I always enjoy the opportunity to savor a slower pace of life.  One of these days....

Not so wild anymore

As a new mama I've been feeling very cooped up in the house. Since I had a c-section I wasn't allowed to drive for two weeks...not sure if that's because of the incision or the pain meds. Cabin fever does not become me. I was getting depressed. As an extrovert I tend to get my energy from other people and social situations. Usually I'm quite the butterfly out and about talking, visiting and lunching with girlfriends. It seems my new little Bird has clipped my wings considerably...which I expected but you never really know what "your life is about to change" means until you experience it.

Monday evening after the baby was fed my husband and I were going to load her in the car and go pick up a few items from Babies R Us. He was going to drive me there and sit in the car with Bird while I went in. Then, I had a revelation. It's been two weeks. I'm sprung! I can drive!

So I casually say to my Boo, "You know, I can drive now, maybe I'll just go by myself." To which my wonderfully astute husband replied, "Oh, okay. It'll give you a chance to get away from me and the baby for a while." Isn't he swell? I love that my husband isn't afraid of babies or diaper changing or newborn crying. Since she was just fed I calculated my available time, handed her over to Boo and was out the door lickety split. Really, I was afraid my car might not remember me. Driving was a strange sensation and it took a few minutes to get comfortable. It was about 8pm on a very warm summer evening...my window rolled down, my cd's playing. Who knew such a simple activity would bring me such a feeling of freedom and relief? I was gone for about an hour. One blissful hour to myself on a summer night.

I returned home as a refreshed, relaxed new mama. The Bird was the picture of tranquility; asleep on her daddy's chest.

What do you really want to be?

It's Friday afternoon, thank goodness the weekend is here. I've been thinking lately about what I would do if I didn't have to work in corporate sales anymore. I have several ideas, not sure if any of them are realistic and so, friends, I ask you for your thoughts.
First, I could write. Probably try writing some fiction. I've already started writing my memoirs of my life thusfar. I can tell you that this blog really hasn't given you any insight into my past or the depth, perversion and weirdness of it all. My story might make for some interesting reading. A couple of you can vouch for that I know.
Or, I could develop my photography hobby into something. Maybe stock photos, maybe pet photography.
I'd really like to convert my passion for horses into a vocation but aside from lots of overhead costs of owning a boarding facility, I'm not sure what else might be an option. Please don't suggest selling insurance to horse people, no interest here.
Or maybe there's something out there I just haven't thought of yet.
How about y'all? Have you ever thought about what you'd really like to do for a living? If you feel like sharing your dream or passions, let loose! I'd love to hear what else other folks are thinking. I think we're in a very importent time right now in history and people are rethinking their priorities. What are your thoughts?

The Lake

We went to the lake two weekends ago to tear out the old dock. We are going back to the lake this weekend to build the new dock. One of my favorite things to do is scoot out of the cabin early in the morning to enjoy and observe the peace and quiet that I can only find there. Come take a morning walk with me...

My grandpa built this cabin 50 years ago. It sits on a small lake with some other cabins. It is the only remaining place from my childhood that I can still go to. It's not fancy but so many memories live there and so many more are waiting to be made.

Can't wait

I've been anticipating this morning all week. My Boo and I got to sleep in, in fact, he's still asleep. We are going to pack up, load the car, throw the dogs in and head out to the sticks for a nice relaxing weekend. We're going to the lake to hang around and be lazy. Today is also my mom's 50th birthday and Monday is Boo's birthday. I plan to sit on the screened porch at the cabin overlooking the lake and read, nap, chatter and go for walks with my camera. Boo plans to sit on the screened porch, drink some beer, play cards and eat. All in all, it will be a well deserved break from the grind. Oh, the dogs plan to swim in the lake, go for walks with me and my camera and sleep on the screened porch.
Hope your Labor Day holiday is everything you're hoping for, talk to you when I return.

There she goes....

I've been listening to country music lately. I haven't listened in a few years. Maybe that's why sometimes I don't really know the current, most prominent version of myself. I have found that there a couple different versions of me. Not like scary Sybil, it just seems that I am a walking contradiction sometimes.
Maybe I 'd better clarify. Listening to this music takes me back to the root of who I am, how I was raised and where I come from. For the past few years I have become a slick, polished, smartypants career gal who buys too many clothes and shoes. Just the other day I was considering purchasing a pair of $200 jeans. I promise they didn't have platinum stitching or gold coins in the pockets. In fact, they looked pretty much like my GAP jeans...with a different tag sewn to the rear. But my rationale was, I deserve these jeans I've earned a treat, they'll look even better on my ass than Levi's. That's when (thank heavens) my alter ego showed up and smacked me upside the head. She told my slick self imagine what you could spend $200 on. It doesn't make any kind of good sense to blow it on a single pair of jeans, you tard. And amazingly my smartypants self listened to her. Walked out of the store.
Living in the city is sort of like constant peer pressure. Boo and I live on the northside of our major city. It's the more affluent side of town I guess. It wasn't my choice mind you..Boo already owned this house when we got hitched. And we aren't right in the thick of the yuppies, thank the angels. To illustrate my point; my sales territory is on the westside. All the little rural towns are over there. As I drove around today I noticed lots of pick-up trucks and hard working sweaty men. I like pickups and sweaty men. Then I started driving home and the closer I got to the northside, the pickups turned into SUV's (the fancy kinds) Mercedes, Lexus and Beemers mostly carrying men in white collared shirts with ties. There was more pavement, upscale shopping areas, and not so many trees. Now, I want to own up to the fact that my husband drives a Lexus, but he bought it pre-owned and plans to drive it into eternity. And we're going to pay it off this year.
But still. It's like a fancy car is a prerequisite to live on the northside. And fancy jeans, and shoes and Pottery Barn and Barnes and Noble...and I get sucked in because I forget that the real world lies beyond the city limits, down a winding road, over the hill and around the bend as you head into the trees. That's where I come from. That's where I am me. I catch glimpses of me sometimes and I want to grab that girls arm and say hey, take me with you.

2008 and Beyond

The big snowstorm, she is upon us. Yesterday all the newscasts were a buzz of doomsday snow reports. Snow started falling yesterday morning and stopped for awhile, then, while we were snuggled in bed sleeping the motherload dropped on us. Today, according to newscasts, is supposed to be blizzard contitions with 45mph winds whipping the snow into drifts. It's always the blowing and drifting you have to watch out for. Anyway, it's here.

So, it is Sunday morning and I've been up since 6:30 because I just couldn't sleep. Maybe it was the excitement of the new snow. I'm sitting at my dining room table looking out the window, watching Mother Nature do her thing.

I am thinking of the approaching new year and some changes I need to make. I've been considering my spirituality and how I really need to connect with God more often. Sometimes I feel a little too much a part of this material world and I need to maintain a closer connection with the bigger picture. I really think most people need to do this. It seems like the majority of folks are so out of touch with themselves and the divine nature of our earth. They (and I) get so enthralled with the misguided expectations and ideals of pop culture, material society and social climbing. How much money? How fast? How big? How much better? Comparing ourselves to each other and what we have or don't have, that we think we need. It gets so complicated. We make money only to spend it as fast as we can because society has taught us to be hyperconsumers. Which in turn makes us scramble around frantically trying to make more money. The cycle repeats itself over and over. Earn, spend, repeat.

This new year I want to simplify. I want to take care of my body. I want to put good things in it. I want to put good things in my mind too. The money I make, I want to save it. I want to invest it so my family can have the home we want someday and Boo and I can retire and not have to be Wal-Mart greeters when we're 70 because we neglected to save for retirement.
This year I want to instill lifestyle changes so I have a healthy mind, body and spirit. I want to relax. I want to nurture my spirit. I want to spend time outdoors, breathing fresh air and enjoying the beautiful earth.
Simplify. Mind, Body, Spirit.